We come across different people, relationships, events that stamp their experiences in our memory. While we tend to forget the beautiful memories, the unpleasant ones get stuck to us. They keep haunting and hurting us but we don’t let them go easily. I have gone through this and I am sure you have too. So how do we deal with it? Does ‘forgiving’ sounds good ? I know it’s not easy, but not impossible either.
“Forgiveness provides you the path to let go the unwanted feelings and painful past you always wanted to do away with.”
Forgiveness is not ‘just’ about letting go something or someone. Forgiveness is all about letting yourself free. Free from pain, free from grudges, free from unpleasant memories. After all who doesn’t love freedom?
Sometimes by playing victim of a situation or relationship, we subtly seek people’s love, care and sympathy. This role of playing a victim could have resulted from your judgements about yourself and about others.
Your past cannot be an excuse to not able to live your present the way you want it to be and certainly not the future you want to shape. So, drop the stories you have built up for yourself so far and move towards a more fulfilling life because you are special and you are gifted.
Let me encourage you to do a small exercise for forgiveness:
- Make a list of people, relationships, events which haunts and pains you.
- Prepare yourself to forgive them, thereby making your life more simpler and fulfilling.
- Now close your eyes.
- Think of a person or relationship you want to forgive. Feel how compassionate you are, feel how much love you have for that person/relationship.
- Bring in that feeling of compassion and love on to you and visualise yourself being wrapped with it like a blanket.
- Be in that state for sometime and enjoy the blissful feeling of love and compassion.
- Now being in that state, say a few things to yourself that you would like to forgive (like forgiving a person or relationship, a past event etc.) with this energy of compassion and love. Example – “I forgive him for whatever he had done with me”, “I forgive myself to have misunderstood someone I shouldn’t have”, “I forgive myself to have judged myself for something I which I am not”. Say it louder and clear so that you can hear, mean and feel it.
You can make a practice of this forgiveness exercise regularly for anything you would like to not haunt and hurt you. Make your mind clear of any self-doubt. Initially, your mind may not accept it, but that is normal. You have to keep doing it, for you and your well-being.
Forgiveness helps avoid toxic people and relationships enter your life. This helps cultivate positive thoughts and compassion for everyone around you. This also helps heal your past and improve relationships with others, and more importantly make you more relaxed and calm.
This will give you room to release your ‘not so good past’ and let you live in your ‘present’. Live this very moment as it is where you can be what you are and what you want to be. It can also help create an environment for you to convert your affirmations to manifestation, enabling you to attract what you desire in your life.
With so much love !
Piyush