Are you stuck to your past ? Do you feel it tough and sometime impossible to move out of an emotional bondage or say unwanted feelings? Don’t worry, you are not alone on this planet to have such experiences. Especially, negatives emotions or unwanted feelings are sticky and effort is required to let them go.
“Renew, release, let go. Yesterday’s gone. There’s nothing you can do to bring it back. You can’t “should’ve” done something. You can only DO something. Renew yourself. Release that attachment. Today is a new day!”
– Steve Maraboli
So why to let go stuffs? Because it gives you freedom to be ‘yourself’. It helps you focus on more important things in life.
Just ask a few questions to yourself:
- Will anything change if you keep replaying the past?
- How does it help you holding grudges against others?
- How does it serve you to keep repeating the thoughts about someone you don’t like?
- Does it give you satisfaction or solve a problem if you keep holding something which hurts you?
If your answer to the above questions is not yielding any positive outcome and you are looking forward to a more fulfilling life, here are a few tips to help you towards handling it efficiently.
- Don’t try to avoid your past or feelings that you are holding with you. Re-visit it, analyse the root-cause of that feeling take lessons if any and then pass it off. I would prefer writing these down in a piece of paper to get an overall picture of it and then trash it for once and for all.
- Accept the things as they are. Convince yourself that you will not be able to change what has already happened. Making mistake is human and it’s all right. The only thing you can try to ensure that things do not get repeated to give you similar experience.
- Focus on what you have today and how can you manage it for a better tomorrow. See, hear and feel your ‘this’ moment. Make yourself understand that you can’t control everything and others actions.
- Be outcome oriented – ‘What is that you are going to achieve out of it?’. Keep asking yourself the same question repeatedly until you get a satisfactory reply on its real benefits.
- Practice to bring in more positive thoughts and intentions with things around you. Nurture them.
- Learn to devote yourself towards self-love. You are a special someone. Focus on your positive speciality and how you can help others passing through problems as this.
- Practice to forgive others. This can give you ultimate solace from unwanted bondings.
- Express gratitude towards anyone and everyone – who has made your day, one who gave a momentary smile on your face, one who helped you even a bit. Do it honestly from within. You can maintain a daily practice of expressing gratitude at the end of day before you hit the bed (either explicitly to the other person/Universe/Higher Power or silently from the core of your heart).
You may seek someone’s support (one who you trust the most or your well wisher) for performing any of the above steps (except for forgiveness and gratitude) and observe your improvements, but remember that the action and accountability lies solely with you as you would be the end beneficiary of letting this go.
Trust this process and trust yourself while performing this ‘let go’ exercise.
With so much love !
Piyush